I am – Prince’s Mama

Since the beginning of this nightmare, I have heard a lot about bravery and strength.  I have thought a lot about what these two words really mean to me.  A lot of people have been wondering how it is that I am able to keep talking about this and why I haven’t just walked away from this and attempted to move on with my life.  Here is the best answer I can give for that:

I was chosen to be Prince’s Mama.

I didn’t choose to have Prince die so young.  I didn’t choose for my story – our story- to be so terrifying and tragic.  This story – this cause – chose me.  I have received hundreds of emails and Facebook messages from women (and some men) who have been fighting this broken system.  It’s true that my story is terrible and tragic, but it is not the only one and I am not alone.

I could choose to walk away and try to forget all of the painful memories, but to walk away from this story and this cause would also be choosing to walk away from my baby boy.  That is not a choice any good mother would make.  This cause is bigger than me and Prince and, unfortunately, we are now faces in a sea of other people whom the justice system has failed.

When I first heard that my son was dead, I wanted to die with him.  I vividly remember contemplating jumping into the grave and laying next to his tiny casket.  That seemed like the easier option than staying here on earth and continuing to fight.  After laying in bed for at least a week, crying myself to sleep at night, and nearly dying from an inability to eat, I remembered a promise that I made to Prince as I sat beside his open casket and read to him for the last time.  I promised him that I would always fight for him.

God chose the two of us for a reason.  I will always stand up and fight for justice with my words and the way in which I choose to live my life.  I will carry his memory like the proud Mama I am.  I will think about him every day and imagine how he would be growing if he would have been allowed to live.

As a parent, I had a responsibility to protect my son because he could not protect himself.  Now, after his death, I have a responsibility to protect his memory and protect his civil right to justice.  Our country is in trouble.  Our children are in trouble.  Justice is in trouble.

I am not brave, I was chosen.  I am strong, but that is only because my son made me that way.

I hope you all will continue to stand with me as I stand for my son – as I stand for the children who have come before him – and the children who will come after him

3 Comments

  1. DYG on November 27, 2012 at 5:29 pm

    I am Elisabeth and Thomas’s mother. Their well-being is in the hands of a judge, and the judge cares little about their emotional health. I’ve been fighting for 14 years to protect my children from their neglectful, emotionally and verbally abusive father, and his enabling family.

    I don’t have any words of solace to give you, and they probably wouldn’t mean much anyway. I suppose I wanted you to know that I understand, to a certain extent, what you’ve been through. There’s nothing quite like being emotionally raped by the courts. My children are, by the mercy of God, still alive, if not completely whole.

    The people who could have saved your son utterly failed him and they need to pay for it. Lucifer must pay for it. I pray for that.



  2. stillhere on November 28, 2012 at 12:01 pm

    Hera,
    I really respect your decision and position with Prince. I, too, cannot and will not turn my back on this crisis which has been ignored too long and by so many. I was told when I asked where all the mothers were in hopes of finding support or a group to work with that the mothers are either so devistated they are non-functional or once their court orders are in and at their earliest ability, they just crawl away licking their wounds. I remember thinking, “I can’t do that!”

    I never said it but I am here. Your story unfolding before my eyes is just solidification of my feelings. There are too many children disregarded in family court and too much money going to bogus causes helping dangerous people get access to our most vulnerable people in our society. It amazes me how many people think it’s not their problem when it most certainly is.

    You are an inspiration Hera.



  3. Debbie on February 20, 2013 at 3:50 pm

    Hera
    I hope you can draw strength from all the people all over the world who support you and care about you. Your story should be compulsory reading for every Judge, Social Worker and Police Officer in the civilized world. So many women and children are taken every week, every day – but your story is unique as you recognized the danger yet no-one who mattered would listen.
    I believe you are a special person and your voice will be heard.
    I pray you win your new Court case – so these strangers who are able to control the fate and destinies of people they don’t know will realise that they are personally accountable for the decisions they make.